Snowman

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Tomliner
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Snowman

Post by Tomliner »

In England it had been snowing all night. So at ....

8:00 I made a snowman.

8:10 A feminist passed by and asked me why I didn't make a snow woman.

8:15 So, I made a snow woman

8:17 My feminist neighbour complained about the snow woman's voluptuous chest saying it objectified snow women everywhere

8:20 The gay couple living nearby threw a hissy fit and moaned it could have been two snowmen instead

8:22 The transgender person asked why I didn't just make one snow person with detachable parts

8:25 The vegans at the end of the lane complained about the carrot nose, as veggies are food and not to decorate snow figures with.

8:28 I am being called a racist because the snow couple is white..

8:31 The Muslim gent across the road demands that the snow woman wear a burqa

8:40 The Police arrive saying someone has been offended

8:42 The feminist neighbour complained again that the broomstick of the snow woman needs to be removed because it depicted women in a domestic role

8:43 The Government equalities officer arrived and threatened me with eviction

8:45 TV news crew from the BBC shows up. I am asked if I know the difference between snowmen and snow-women? I reply, "Snowballs" and am called a sexist.

9:00 I'm on the News as a suspected terrorist, racist, homophobic sensibility offender bent on stirring up trouble during difficult weather.

9:10 I am asked if I have any accomplices... My children are taken by social services

9:29 Far left protesters offended by everything are marching down the street demanding for me to be beheaded

Moral: There is no moral to this story. It's just the world in which we live today and it's going to get worse.
8) EricT
Now at the age where I know I like girls but can't remember why!

Dev One
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Re: Snowman

Post by Dev One »

And no mention of Brexit, or Harry & Megan!!!!!
Keith

adysmith
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Re: Snowman

Post by adysmith »

Harry and Meghan can be abbreviated to Megxit and then you cover both topics :lol:
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511Flyer
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Re: Snowman

Post by 511Flyer »

You should have made a Snowperson.

:dunno:

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airboatr
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Re: Snowman

Post by airboatr »

Short answer

Mumble and make hand signs.

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Nigel H-J
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Re: Snowman

Post by Nigel H-J »

Even a better idea, just make a huge snowball which cannot be rated sexist. :worried:

Nigel.
I used to be an optimist but with age I am now a grumpy old pessimist.

511Flyer
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Re: Snowman

Post by 511Flyer »

Snowballs? Sexist! Masculine.

The World is round. One ball. Will they be wanting to change the shape of it?

:rant:

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airboatr
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Re: Snowman

Post by airboatr »

Extremists have floated the idea that if NASA hooked up all the available rockets, jet engines and whatnot,
And used them to move the earth closer to the sun, we could get more solar power. :agree:

:worried:

:wasntme:

TommyJ
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Re: Snowman

Post by TommyJ »

airboatr wrote:
16 Jan 2020, 21:34
Extremists have floated the idea that if NASA hooked up all the available rockets, jet engines and whatnot,
And used them to move the earth closer to the sun, we could get more solar power. :agree:

:worried:

:wasntme:

Ha! This is a very strange proposal. It sounds like a cartoon))
And apparently, among these extremists, there are no those who really understand what this will lead to. Even if we imagine that it is possible in real life)

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Tomliner
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Re: Snowman

Post by Tomliner »

Blimey I’d forgotten that I posted that. Not much seems to have changed since then apart from Coronavirus, lockdowns economic disasters etc. Oh well just look on the bright side of life. Hey someone could use that last sentence as a basis for a song. :agree: EricT
Now at the age where I know I like girls but can't remember why!

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