A cautionary tale

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Filonian
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A cautionary tale

Post by Filonian »

The Tale of Cuthbert Bostril

This is the tale of Cuthbert bostril
Who thought he'd only use one nostril
So he made himself a sort of cover
To stop him breathing throught the other.
And so he wandered round the place
Wearing a muzzle on his face
Until he met Euphemia Muck
The barmaid at the dog and duck.
Euphemia loved him from the start And toild him frankly, "Have a heart"
Remove that gadget from your clock,
In other words your nose unblock."
Ahhh, such was love, it made him weaken,
He took the shutter off his beak 'n
Wedding bell rang out with Cuth.
Letting both nostrils do their stuff.
Alas, alack their bliss was short,
Ere long our Cuthbert thought,
He'd but an eye shield and then try,
To tead the paper with one eye.
And then Euphemia saw with fear
He'd cotton wool stuffed in one ear.
And then he bought a sort of peg
And started walking on one leg.
So Euphemois took the only course
And being granted her divorce
Married a bloke called Arnold Stout
What didn't muck himself about.



Graham
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The early bird gets the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese.

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Tako_Kichi
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Re: A cautionary tale

Post by Tako_Kichi »

Made I larf! :lol:

Why do I feel this needs a part two? :dunno:

I always found this place a great source of monologues with Marriott Edgar, Joyce Grenfell and Mike Harding among my favourites:
http://www.monologues.co.uk/
Larry

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Paul K
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Re: A cautionary tale

Post by Paul K »

Never let it be said that you don't leave the CBFS forum wiser and enriched.

Thank you Graham.

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Airspeed
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Re: A cautionary tale

Post by Airspeed »

Ultra-amusing, Graham, many thanks. :thumbsup:

spot
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Re: A cautionary tale

Post by spot »

That’s great, it I agree it needs verse 2 :lol: :lol:

Brian.
Low and slow, the way to go ;)

511Flyer
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Re: A cautionary tale

Post by 511Flyer »

To this tale, is there no end?
Euphemia was driven round the bend
when Arnold Stout did turn about
and became a DARN SOT LOUT.
Fed up with being married to an ANAGRAM
She got dressed up and went out on the lam
Looking for a night of thrill
she happened upon Cuthbert Nostril
She cried out "are you up for sex?"
But he was engrossed with FSX
She said "OK Cuthbert, it's your call"
and now he's only got one ball!

:wasntme:

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Airspeed
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Re: A cautionary tale

Post by Airspeed »

:lol: His dreams come true!

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