Holy e-mail

[speedbird591]

Hello Mike. I'm glad to see that your legal team are earning their stubbies in looking after your interests. But a bit of friendly advice here, mate. If they are going to continue raising questions about the teachings of the prophet (peace be upon him) then you should disassociate yourself with them before you wake up with a fatwa pinned to your forehead

At this point, in case any mullahs or ayatollahs are members of this forum, I should clarify that everything I've said is taken from the Quran and other sacred Islamic texts and any revenge attacks should be directed to disbelievers who live...oooh, let's say...more than 126 miles from Finsbury Park mosque

Here's a quote that might satisfy your legal team for a bit

Each time we sleep with a Houri we find her virgin. Besides, the penis of the Elected never softens. The erection is eternal; the sensation that you feel each time you make love is utterly delicious and out of this world and were you to experience it in this world you would faint. Each chosen one [i.e. Muslim] will marry seventy [sic] houris, besides the women he married on earth, and all will have appetizing vaginas.
Al-Itqan fi Ulum al-Qur'an, p. 351

What is putting me off a bit is the specified height and width of 60x7 cubits, which seems to covert to 27.5 metres tall and 3.2 metres wide. I know you Aussies are used to big women, but I think I might find 72 of those a bit intimidating

Eric - You raise a reasonable concern there, mate, especially if they're that big! But I can't find the answer in Wiki Islam so you'd best pop down your local mosque and raise the issue with your local friendly mullah. Let us know how you get on. Don't forget to remove your footwear before entering, OK?

Ian

[airboatr]

... and a towel - thingy. well it's kinda like a towel

[Airspeed]

You've heard of "The Last Post", this may be mine....
Asked my wife if she'd be my Houri but I think she must have mis-heard the word.


I'vE tap d tbe bots of my keykoasd back t gether to sezd thos fimal merrage....

Trief to appease jer by sayinh OK, jusp keet bejng my fatwan, but she'ss comink in fur anotter pass.....