String theory for beginners

[Archer]

"That a given piece of string, left to its own devices, will finish up tangled."

I fear that this will be impossible to prove. I've asked my better half and she assured me that once the garment has reached a state where it is only a 'piece of...', it has become rather unwearable.

[Airspeed]

I don't wish to pry into your private life, Archer, but may I suggest that if your good lady is wearing a string, it will not be left to its own devices?

[Paul K]

I once asked a ship's old bosun for a piece of string. He glared at me for a moment then, narrowing his eyes, gazed off to the watery horizon.

"Ain't no string in this fleet," he growled, "what you want is a line".

He gave me a line, which was just a piece of string, and I went away thinking what a bloody w*anker the bosun was.

[airboatr]

I won a Laguna once with strings attached.

The upholstery.

[robbie]

I think Joe is stringing us along!

Regards
Nigel.

Yep Joe sure does know how to spin a yarn!!

[Airspeed]

"String theory for beginners" - How long is a piece?

One of many answers, George; it took longer to make up than a piece of string:

A piece of string, is a wonderful thing,
It runs from one end to the other.
You can soon moor your boat,
Tie up girlfriend, a dog or a goat.
Or you can even tie up your Mother!

[Paul K]

I won a Laguna once with strings attached.

The upholstery.

That wasn't string, Joe - that was the tow rope.

[Airspeed]

Joe, what are you doing with Swiss chocolate in your b.b.?

[Tako_Kichi]

I don't wish to pry into your private life, Archer, but may I suggest that if your good lady is wearing a string, it will not be left to its own devices?

It's been my experience that if a lady is wearing anything 'string like' it will inevitably migrate into a crevice somewhere or other.

[airboatr]

Mike! Your thread is unraveling!