This Sums It Up
Moderators: Guru's, The Ministry
This Sums It Up
An Obituary printed recently in the Times that you may have missed - very sad news...
Today we mourn the passing of a beloved old friend, Common Sense, after a long and constructive life.
No one knows for sure how old he was, since his birth records were long ago buried under bureaucratic red tape. He will be remembered for many great achievements, amongst that for having cultivated such valuable lessons as:
- Knowing when to come in out of the rain;
- Why the early bird gets the worm;
- Understanding that life isn't always fair;
- and appreciating that sometimes it maybe was my fault.
Common Sense lived by simple, sound financial policies - don't spend more than you can earn - and reliable strategies -adults, not children, are in charge...
His health began to deteriorate when well-intentioned but overbearing regulations were set in place... Reports of a 6-year-old boy charged with sexual harassment for kissing a classmate; teens suspended from school for using mouthwash after lunch; a teacher fired for reprimanding an unruly student, only worsened his condition.
He lost ground when parents started to attack teachers for doing the job that they themselves had failed to do in disciplining their unruly children.
His health declined even further when schools were required to get parental consent to administer sun lotion or a Paracetamol to a student, but could not inform parents when a student became pregnant and wanted to have an abortion.
He took a severe beating when you couldn't defend yourself from a burglar in your own home and the burglar could sue you for assault.
He began to lose the will to live as the churches became businesses and criminals received better treatment than their victims.
Common Sense finally lost that will after a woman failed to appreciate that a steaming cup of coffee was hot; she spilled a little in her lap and was promptly awarded a huge settlement. This blow proved to be fatal.
Common Sense was preceded in death by his beloved parents Truth and Trust, by his wife Discretion, by his dearly missed daughter Responsibility and by his son Reason.
He is survived by his 4 stepbrothers I Know My Rights, I Want It Now, Someone Else Is To Blame and I'm A Victim. There is to be a judicial enquiry into the status of the Will, as this has already been disputed...
Not many attended the funeral because so few realised he was gone. If you still remember him, pass this on. If not, join the majority and do nothing.
EricT
Now at the age where I know I like girls but can't remember why!
- Garry Russell
- The Ministry
- Posts: 27180
- Joined: 29 Jan 2005, 00:53
- Location: On the other side of the wall
Re: This Sums It Up
So very true
Garry
"In the world of virtual reality things are not always what they seem."
"In the world of virtual reality things are not always what they seem."
- steelsporran
- VC10
- Posts: 518
- Joined: 23 Oct 2006, 02:03
- Location: 41°31'18.50"S 173°57'42.00"E
Re: This Sums It Up
steelsporran wrote:Goodbye cruel world. I'm off to slash me wrists.
Over a Rugby match loss?
Nigel²
Re: This Sums It Up
did anyone see that ludicrous display last night?
- steelsporran
- VC10
- Posts: 518
- Joined: 23 Oct 2006, 02:03
- Location: 41°31'18.50"S 173°57'42.00"E
Re: This Sums It Up
England 22, Scotland 16.
Nigel²
Nigel²
Re: This Sums It Up
I must admit I'm delighted that England won.... because if they hadn't we might have ended up with the wooden spoon. At least this way when we get thumped next weekend we wont be bottom of the heap.
Ben.
- steelsporran
- VC10
- Posts: 518
- Joined: 23 Oct 2006, 02:03
- Location: 41°31'18.50"S 173°57'42.00"E
Re: This Sums It Up
Aha! With you now, wouldn't be too much new there would there?
The only rugby news down here has been Christchurch losing its world cup games. Its been the lead item ahead of death, destruction, mayhem and nuclear fall-out. .
Frankly my dear...
The only rugby news down here has been Christchurch losing its world cup games. Its been the lead item ahead of death, destruction, mayhem and nuclear fall-out. .
Frankly my dear...
steelsporran