Abbot and Costello in 21st century!!

[hobby]

You have to be old enough to remember Abbott and Costello, and too old to REALLY understand computers, to fully appreciate this. For those of us who sometimes get flustered by our computers, please read on...
If Bud Abbott and Lou Costello were alive today, their famous sketch, 'Who's on First?' might have gone something like this:

COSTELLO CALLS TO BUY A COMPUTER FROM ABBOTT

ABBOTT: Super Duper computer store. Can I help you?

COSTELLO: Thanks. I'm setting up an office in my den and I'm thinking about buying a computer.

ABBOTT: Mac?

COSTELLO: No, the name's Lou.

ABBOTT: Your computer?

COSTELLO: I don't own a computer. I want to buy one.

ABBOTT: Mac?

COSTELLO: I told you, my name's Lou.

ABBOTT: What about Windows?

COSTELLO: Why? Will it get stuffy in here?

ABBOTT: Do you want a computer with Windows?

COSTELLO: I don't know. What will I see when I look at the windows?

ABBOTT: Wallpaper.

COSTELLO: Never mind the windows. I need a computer and software.

ABBOTT: Software for Windows?

COSTELLO: No. On the computer! I need something I can use to write proposals, track expenses and run my business. What do you have?

ABBOTT: Office.

COSTELLO: Yeah, for my office. Can you recommend anything?

ABBOTT: I just did.

COSTELLO: You just did what?

ABBOTT: Recommend something.

COSTELLO: You recommended something?

ABBOTT: Yes.

COSTELLO: For my office?

ABBOTT: Yes.

COSTELLO: OK, what did you recommend for my office?

ABBOTT: Office.

COSTELLO: Yes, for my office!

ABBOTT: I recommend Office with Windows

COSTELLO: I already have an office with windows! OK, let's just say I'm sitting at my computer and I want to type a proposal. What do I need?

ABBOTT: Word.

COSTELLO: What word?

ABBOTT: Word in Office.

COSTELLO: The only word in office is office.

ABBOTT: The Word in Office for Windows.

COSTELLO: Which word in office for windows?

ABBOTT: The Word you get when you click the blue 'W'.

COSTELLO: I'm going to click your blue 'w' if you don't start with some straight answers. What about financial bookkeeping? You have anything I can track my money with?

ABBOTT: Money.

COSTELLO: That's right. What do you have?

ABBOTT: Money.

COSTELLO: I need money to track my money?

ABBOTT: It comes bundled with your computer.

COSTELLO: What's bundled with my computer?

ABBOTT: Money.

COSTELLO: Money comes with my computer?

ABBOTT: Yes. No extra charge.

COSTELLO: I get a bundle of money with my computer? How much?

ABBOTT: One copy.

COSTELLO: Isn't it illegal to copy money?

ABBOTT: Microsoft gave us a license to copy Money.

COSTELLO: They can give you a license to copy money?

ABBOTT: Why not? THEY OWN IT!

(A few days later)

ABBOTT: Super Duper computer store. Can I help you?

COSTELLO: How do I turn my computer off?

ABBOTT: Click on 'START'.............

[Garry Russell]

As I was reading that I could hear their voices

Thanks for that Hobby

Garry

[Tomliner]

Classic,just classic.In fact I might have to visit YouTube to watch the sketch again. EricT

[airboatr]

S u p e r D u p e r computer store..... ..it would be that
excellent!!

...........
I had a thought about the old with the new

What If.... there was a flight attendent, whos name was Stew E'tress, and another named Stew Padass
................

:tab:

[Nigel H-J]

Wonderful, the frustration was setting in as I read through it!! :doho:

Nigel.

[nigelb]

ABBOTT: Super Duper computer store. Can I help you?

COSTELLO: How do I turn my computer off?

ABBOTT: Click on 'START'.............

Very intuitive, no?

Nigel²

[Nigel H-J]

ABBOTT: Super Duper computer store. Can I help you?

COSTELLO: How do I turn my computer off?

ABBOTT: Click on 'START'

Sorry, but thought it would be fun to add a bit more to Nigel2's script. Any-one else up for it?

Nigel

COSTELLO: I don’t want to start I want to turn it off

ABBOTT: You have to start before you turn off.

COSTELLO: Why do I have to start to turn off?

ABBOT: Because that is what windows does

COSTELLO: My windows just open and close

ABBOTT: If you closed windows then open it again

COSTELLO: I don’t want to open windows, when I’m gone anyone can get in

ABBOTT: Have you got a firewall installed?

COSTELLO: No, just a fire exit

[Filonian]

Brilliant James.

I can see I'm going to have to look to my laurels.

Graham

[nigelb]

Nigel+1 -

Great, and I suppose the next little scenario would involve anti-virus with Costello claiming he feels perfectly healthy and does'nt even have a cold.

Nigel²

[airboatr]

spam? ....yes with eggs over easy...