Russ and Sam, two friends, met in the park
every day to feed the pigeons,
watch the squirrels and discuss world problems.
One day Russ didn't show up. Sam didn't think much about it
and figured maybe he had a cold or something. But after Russ
hadn't shown up for a week or so, Sam really got worried.
However, since the only time they ever got together
was at the park, Sam didn't know where Russ lived,
so he was unable to find out what had happened to him.
A month had passed, and Sam figured he had seen the last
of Russ, but one day, Sam approached the park and-
lo and behold!- there sat Russ!
Sam was very excited and happy to see him and told him so.
Then he said, 'For crying out loud Russ, what in the world
happened to you?'
Russ replied, 'I have been in jail.'
'Jail!' cried Sam. What in the world for?'
'Well,' Russ said, 'you know Sue,
that cute little blonde waitress
at the coffee shop where I sometimes go?'
'Yeah,' said Sam, 'I remember her.
What about her?
'Well, the little gold-digging bitch figured I was rich
and she filed rape charges against me and,
at 89 years old, I was so proud
that when I got into court, I pleaded 'guilty'.
'The judge gave me 30 days for perjury.'



