Two pieces Of Tarmac Having a Drink

[Garry Russell]

Paddy's up in court tomorrow on a charge of making counterfeit ten pence pieces.

It seems he was caught red handed when the police raided and found him filing the corners off fifties.

[airboatr]

Gandhi walked barefoot most of the time, which produced an impressive set of calluses on his feet. He also ate very little, which made him rather frail and with his odd diet, he suffered from bad breath. This made him a super calloused fragile mystic hexed by halitosis.

[Garry Russell]

A couple went to a Chinese restaurant and ordered Chicken Supreme

A little while later the waiter placed a large lidded dish on the table.

The women reached forwards and as she did so, the lid lifted slightly and she saw two beady eyes scan left and right before catching her gaze at which point they dived down with the lid snapping back in place.

Not believing what she'd seen, she told her husband to open the lid and see if he noticed anything odd.


He reached out and exactly the same ting happened...two little eyes popped up, caught sight of him and disappeared.

He called the waiter over and told him what they had just seen.

He immediately checked their order and broke down apologetically..."Velly sowwy sir. you ordard Chicken Supreme and I give you Peking Duck"

[emfrat]

[airboatr]

If you keep making that face. It'll get stuck like that.

[emfrat]

Pat rolled up to a building site, asking about work. The Clerk of Works, a standard-issue wee Englishman in a bowler hat, decided to have some fun at Pat's expense.
"Well, Paddy, I need to give you an intelligence test, before you start. What's the difference between a girder and a joist?"
Oh, says Pat, that's an aisy one - " Goethe wrote 'Faust' , and Joyce wrote ' Ulysses' ..."

[Garry Russell]

Chap down the road used to be an avid tractor enthusiast.

He doesn't bother about them now making him an ... ex tractor fan.

[Airspeed]

Have to put my ear muffs on, all those ba-booms!

[airboatr]

What I would give for Graham or.Eric to repost some of their previously reposted posted material.


A n y thing ...

Wow!