The Church Lady...

[Filonian]

The lady was a Southern Baptist who attended services and taught

Sunday School every week.

One Sunday an out of town acquaintance, a gentleman, was in the pew right behind her.

He noted what a fine looking woman she was. While they were taking up the collection, the man leaned forward and
said "Hey, how about you and I having dinner on Tuesday?"

"Why, yes, that would be nice", the lady responded. Well, the gentleman couldn't believe his luck.

On Tuesday, he picked the lady up and took her to the finest restaurant in that part of South Carolina .

When they sat down, the gentleman looked over at her and suggested: "Would you like a cocktail before dinner?"

"Oh, no," said the fine example of southern womanhood. "What ever would I tell my Sunday School class?"

Well, the gentleman was set back a bit, so he didn't say much until after dinner, when he pulled out a pack of cigarettes and asked: "Would you like a smoke?"

"Oh my goodness, no," said the woman. "I couldn't face my Sunday School class if I did!"

Well, the man felt pretty low after that, so they left, got in his car and as he was driving the lady home, they passed the local Holiday Inn. He'd been morally rebuffed twice already, so he figured he had nothing to lose so he ventured forth with: "Ahhh, mmmm, how would you like to stop at this motel?"

"Sure, that would be nice," she said in anticipation.

The gentleman couldn't believe his ears. He did a fast u-turn right then and there, drove back to the motel and checked in!

The next morning, after a wild and passionate night of the most incredible lovemaking imaginable, the gentleman awoke first.

He looked at the lovely Dixie darlin' lying there in the bed and with remorse thought: "What the hell have I done?"

He shook her awake and pleaded, "I've got to ask you one thing, whatever are you going to tell your Sunday School class?"

The lady said: "The same thing I always tell them, 'You don't have to smoke and drink to have a good time.'"






Graham

[Airspeed]

Mrs Airspeed
And we're not even religious!

PS seeing as you can't believe that I'm lost for words: What the dickens is a "LADT"? How much have you had to drink, Graham?

[DaveB]

A case of T being too close to Y on the keyboard me thinks

ATB
DaveB

[Airspeed]

Or Scotch too close to the porridge jar?

[FlyTexas]

I thought maybe it was a Yorkshire slang word I'd never heard.

Brian

[Filonian]

Dave was right, my pudgy fingers.

You would be amazed at the wonderful spellings I manage to achieve - extra letters etc., with hitting two keys at once.


Graham

[DaveB]

I can do this with ease and I touch type! Get slightly distracted (eg.. by watching the box instead of the screen) and not notice either the left or right hand has moved across and when your eyes revisit the screen.. it looks like someone else has typed in some sort of code

ATB
DaveB

[airboatr]

[DaveB]

Looking at that picture.. I think I'd rather smoke and drink myself to oblivion

ATB
DaveB

[Airspeed]

You're right Dave she "isn't that special" Looks like an extract from "League of Gentlemen".

Graham, is that all it was? I thought you were inventing another word for me, seeing as I was lost for 'em. Keep 'em coming Matey.