A man, while playing on the front nine of a complicated golf course, became confused as to where he was on the course. Looking around, he saw a lady playing ahead of him. He walked up to her, explained his confusion and asked her if she knew what hole he was playing. She replied, “I’m on the 7th hole and you are a hole behind me, so you must be on the 6th hole.” He thanked her and went back to his golf.
On the back nine the same thing happened and he approached her again with the same request. She said, “I’m now on the 14th, and you are still a hole behind me, so you must be on the 13th.” Once again he thanked her and returned to his play.
He finished his round and went into the club house where he saw the lady sitting at the end of the bar. He asked the bartender if he knew the lady. The bartender said that he knew she was a sales lady and that she played the course often.
He approached her and said, “Let me buy you a drink to show my appreciation for your help. I understand that you are a sales lady …. well, I am in sales also. What do you sell?”
She replied, “If I told you, you would only laugh.”
“No I wouldn’t,” he said and persisted that she tell him what she sold.
“Well if you must know”, she answered, “I sell Tampax.”
With that, he choked on his drink, almost fell to the floor and was laughing so hard he lost his breath. She said, “See! I knew you would laugh.”
“Please, please that’s not it at all; I’m not laughing at you," he gasped,
"You see, I'm a toilet paper salesman,
so I just realized that I am still a hole behind you!”
Reminds me of the chap who turned up at his local surgery with a 5-iron neatly wrapped around his skull. The doc asked what on earth happened..?
"Well, Doc, the wife and I play a lot of golf together. This morning we tried a new course, very nice, but being out in the country there were a few cattle around. Anyway, somewhere on the back nine we both had a lost ball. I like the old Dunlop65, but the wife prefers a Titleist. It was a quiet day, so we searched around, and there, under the tail of a cow chewing the cud in the rough, I noticed a golf ball. On looking closer, I saw it was a Titleist. So I lifted up the cow's tail and sang out to the missus "Hey Darling, this looks like yours"....
And that's how i came to have a 5-iron wrapped around me head."
