Nothing is as embarrasing as watching someone do something that
you said couldn't be done.
I used to have a handle on life, but it broke.
There is no pleasure in having nothing to do; the fun is in
having lots to do and not doing it.
Dogs believe they are human. Cats believe they are God.
When it comes to your health, I recommend frequent doses of thatrare commodity among people-common sense.
Where there's smoke, you'll find my wife cooking dinner.
Friendship...Instead of loving your enemies -- treat your friends a littlebetter.
If you have a difficult task, give it to a lazyperson -- they will find an easier way to do it.
All Men Are Animals, Some Just Make Better Pets
A husband is someone who takes out the trash and gives theimpression he just cleaned the whole house.
I am not a vegetarian because I love animals. I am a vegetarianbecause I hate plants.
If you want your spouse to listen and pay strict attention to every word you say, talk in your sleep.
Voters don't decide issues, they decide who will decide issues.
I used to be a doctor, but I didn't have the patients.
The most common form of marriage proposal: "YOU'RE WHAT!?"
When you're finally holding all the cards, why does everyone else decide to play chess.
Work is accomplished by those employees who have not reached their level of incompetence
Why do hummingbirds hum? They forgot the words......
There's only one way to have a happy marriage and as soon as I learn what it is I'll get married again.
What do you do when you see an endangered animal that eats only endangered plants?"
People who are wrapped up in themselves make very small packages.
Age is a very high price to pay for maturity.
To succeed in life, you need two things: ignorance and confidence.
Time is the best teacher; unfortunately it kills all its students!
Why do they lock gas station bathrooms? Are they afraid someone will clean them?
Thirty-five is when you finally get your head together and your body starts falling apart.
They told me I was gullible...and I believed them!
Bessie stopped giving milk the other day. She's an udder failure.
Kind words are short to speak, but their echoes are endless.
You're getting old when you wake up with that morning-after feeling, and you didn't do anything the night before.
God may give you seeds but he won't plant them for you.
Gene Police: "YOU!! Out of the pool!"
A good motto is: Use friendliness but do not use your friends.
Graham
Been thinkin'
Moderators: Guru's, The Ministry
Re: Been thinkin'
OMG, that was brilliant Grahom and so true!
Regards
Nigel.
Regards
Nigel.
I used to be an optimist but with age I am now a grumpy old pessimist.
Re: Been thinkin'
This was my mantra and it worked, especially when the individual was left in no doubt that he/she would keep on doing the job until it was done rightIf you have a difficult task, give it to a lazy person -- they will find an easier way to do it
Have a on me Graham.
Allan
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Re: Been thinkin'
Then there is: If you want a job done quickly, give it to a busy man.
Keith
Keith
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Re: Been thinkin'
Some deep and meaningful stuff in there, Graham.
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- Trident
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Re: Been thinkin'
Words of wisdom indeed...........just one small correction I've been told to mention
Cats don't believe they are God, they simply are.
Signed
Ameera and Nesichah (who is currently between me and my keyboard)
Cats don't believe they are God, they simply are.
Signed
Ameera and Nesichah (who is currently between me and my keyboard)
In ancient times cats were worshipped as gods; they have not forgotten this. – Terry Pratchett
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Re: Been thinkin'
If one is an ancient Egyptian......
Keith
Keith