It's a double dip recession.
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63 Pakistanis died in Bradford this morning.
It was not a terrorist attack, a bunk bed collapsed.
The police are blaming AL IKEA.
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Jonathan Ross has been accused of shoplifting a kitchen utensil from Tesco.
Ross says it was a whisk he was prepared to take!
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Paddy & Mick stagger out of the zoo with blood pouring from them.
"Bo****ks to that" said Paddy "That's the last time I go lion dancing"
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My mate just hired an Eastern European cleaner, took her 15 hours to hoover
the house.
Turns out she was a Slovak.
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I've been charged with murder for killing a man with sandpaper.
To be honest I only intended to rough him up a bit.
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A mummy covered in chocolate and nuts has been discovered in Egypt .
Archaeologists believe it may be Pharaoh Rocher.
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Two Indian junkies accidentally snorted curry powder instead of cocaine.
Both in hospital... One's in a korma... The other's got a dodgy tikka!
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In the first few days of the Olympics, eastern Europeans took gold, silver, bronze, copper & lead.
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Sailing results are in: USA took gold, GB took silver and Somalia took a middle aged couple from Weymouth
Keith
