You're all a bunch of jokers

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thehappyotter
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You're all a bunch of jokers

Post by thehappyotter »

In a nice way of course...

Everyone here seems to be a little funny, what with all the terrible jokes which get posted each day, i'm asking for your help on a little matter I need sorting.

A friend and collegue of mine is a bit of a joker, it started with him putting horse poo in my kit back, then a live frog in my coat pocket and then, as a way to get me back for the dead mackerel I put in his locker yesterday I was greeted with a whole pigs head in mine when I came to get ready to go home this afternoon.

It's getting out of hand and he needs teaching a lesson!

I can't seem to think of anything to top this, something which won't cause damage anyway...

What practical jokes have people here pulled or had pulled on them, any ideas how I can get the git back?

Filonian
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Post by Filonian »

You have some strange friends o'aquatic beastie, nealy as bad as mine.

The best/worst I have tried was designed to find out which of my workmates was helping himself to my sugar supply at tea breaks.

Filled my jar with salt - did the trick OK.

Graham
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speedbird591
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Post by speedbird591 »

Perhaps you could put Graham in his locker.

Being confronted by a few of those Yorkshire jokes should put an end to his tricks!

Ian

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TobyV
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Post by TobyV »

The guy next door to me in my first year halls at university was an arse. I just needed to get that straight before I explain what was done to him. Towards the end of the year, because he considered himself a popular chap and left his door open, one of the other OTC guys decided to douse his room with a powder fire extinguisher. By the time they finished it looked like it had been snowing in there. Sadly this had the unfortunate side effect of triggering the smoke alarm and thus calling out the fire brigade. They were observed to recognise the perpetrator as the same guy who 6 months earlier had detonated a firework outside my room at 2.40am in December :huf: One of them said to him "Powder sets off fire alarms, its a learning curve".

Not content with this some of the people from the next corridor disappeared out that evening and collected a quantity of cow excrement which they left in a plastic tub outside his door with a spoon in the top :shock: The reference was to his hobby of being a "sh1t stirrer", deliberately provoking various people with rumours to cause ugly scenes between people for his own amusement when he got drunk.

Other good ones were:

Getting a number of people to bounce someone's car at the rear and thus repark it at 90 degrees to the way it had been left

Leaving some old fish in the passenger cabin air scoops of someones car to give the interior a new aroma

(On a rear wheel drive car); jacking the car under the differential just enough so the wheels are just off the ground. When they get in the wheels will just spin and the car will go nowhere. This was done to Ayrton Senna by mechanics at Lotus' Hethel site when he went there to sign up for their F1 team for the 1985 season.

Disclaimer:
I do not condone any of the above as it might constitute criminal damage Image

airboatr

Post by airboatr »

his perdictability is his weakness mate
set him up for something you know he'll go for
and have a plan to get him whilst he thinks
he getting you
cold bucket of water on the head
or something to scare the bejeseus outa him
but here's the real trick
when it happens and you get him you cann't say sorry or
anything like that, keep a straight face
and ask him if he's game for another go
then turn and walk away , if he starts talking
pay him no attention..
trust me if you do it right he;ll never mess with you
again...
:dunno: just a suggestion..............

AndyMinx
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Post by AndyMinx »

This is similar to a problem I had with a 'friend' of mine: His 'jokes' often involving my car.
One time I returned to my car to find he had pasted sheep S**t over the door handles!
Then we were one day all travelling back from the cinema when he thought it would be funny to throw tomatos at my car from another while driving! (he wasnt' driving himdelf)

Luckily no-one I know likes him right now for being such a w*%£*r to everyone over the past few months!


Cheers,
Andy M.

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jonesey2k
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Post by jonesey2k »

Steal his car keys, then wind his window down, and then put broken glass on the seat and the pavement outside/ Helll probs drive around for a few days with a binbag selotaped to his car needlessly!
Error 482: Somebody shot the server with a 12 gauge.

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Charlie Bravo
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Post by Charlie Bravo »

jonesey2k wrote:Steal his car keys, then wind his window down, and then put broken glass on the seat and the pavement outside/ Helll probs drive around for a few days with a binbag selotaped to his car needlessly!
Thats good, I like it :wink:
A bird in the hand will probably sh!t on your wrist.

AndyMinx
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Post by AndyMinx »

Jonesey, I love it! :lol:
Andy M.

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VEGAS
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Post by VEGAS »

One of my personal favourites and used to work every time whilst at college.

Make sure your mate's asleep and obviously in the most masculine manner you can, slip several chocolate buttons delicately and carefully down the crack of his a*se. Then leave them to melt over night.

When he wakes up in the morning the chocolate will have melted into a nice paste and he will think he has s**t himself. Have a camera ready for the facial expression! :wink:
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